Carlo Taormina, Life/High-Performance Coach and Keynote Speaker, shares his journey of overcoming depression and suicidal ideation and how he now helps others do the same. He emphasizes the importance of giving oneself one more chance and taking a leap of faith. Carlo discusses the desperate feeling of wanting to try one more time and the comfort that comes from having a backup plan.

This podcast is powered by LeggUP, the only accelerated platform with a holistic approach to professional development that guarantees and nurtures the growth of employees. Click here to learn more: https://www.leggup.com/

Subscribe to the Talent Empowerment Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@TomFinnovationΒ 

πŸ“ŒTALKING POINTS

05:22 Changing Body Language and Environment

12:34 Helping Others and Serving

31:33 Taking the First Step and Making Decisions

πŸ”—CONNECT WITH CARLO

πŸ”—CONNECT WITH TOM

Tom Finn (00:01.395)

Welcome welcome to the show my friends today. We are learning from Carlo Taormina. Carlo, welcome to the show!

‍

carlo (00:08.558)

What's up? Glad to be here, man.

‍

Tom Finn (00:11.283)

Well, we are glad to have you on the show today for a very special episode to talk about some important topics that affect all of us in the workplace and at home. But let's jump right into who you are and get a better understanding of that. Carlo has overcome clinical depression and suicidal ideation and has emerged as a beacon of hope for those struggling with similar challenges. And with a diverse background in personal training and coaching and keynote speaking, Carlo has dedicated his life to uplifting and inspiring others. As a powerful coach and keynote speaker, Carlo's impact extends across a wide spectrum from Fortune 500 companies to universities to local communities. His mission is to help others unleash their potential and find the strength to overcome their own adversities. So my friend, let's start right there. Your mission involves helping others and helping people find themselves and overcome adversity. What advice would you give to someone struggling with feelings of hopelessness or depression?

‍

carlo (01:01.132)

The best piece of advice I can probably give is something that somebody may not be acceptable to initially, but I would first say give yourself one more chance. Give yourself one more opportunity. I would say a leap of faith is probably one of the best things you can do because I told myself the one thing I did was take a leap of faith, was try one more time even though I felt I exhausted all of my other options and they didn't work. And I'm sure we're going to get to that in a moment. But my best piece of advice is despite all the attempts you've already tried, give yourself one more time, one more attempt, one more leap of faith and you'll be surprised where it takes you.

‍

Tom Finn (01:57.651)

So what does that feel like when somebody is trying to give themselves one more chance, one more moment in time? Like what does that actually feel like when somebody's struggling and they feel like they can't get out of the woods?

‍

carlo (02:11.275)

Um, in my own personal experience, it felt desperate. Like I felt like, it's kind of weird and I don't know if anyone else kind of felt like, or feels like this, but when I was going through my own trials and tribulations dealing with depression and suicide, I was very desperate and I was like, I just need to try one more time. But it was like out of exhaustion. I was like, okay, let me just do one more time. And I did. And. The second part or the second half of that feeling was… oddly enough comforting and not the way you're thinking because when I was trying to make this decision on saying, okay, should I take this one step, this action step? Should I take a leap of faith and try one more time? My reasoning behind it was, okay, if I do and it doesn't work, I have a plan B. I can clock out early. And that's what my process of thinking was at the time. And for some odd reason, it brought me comfort knowing that, okay, if this doesn't work, I know what I can do later. You know what I mean? I can clock out early. And that's obviously not the best place to be, but that's what I dealt with and maybe a lot of people could probably resonate with that.

‍

Tom Finn (03:30.323)

Yeah, I mean, it's a pretty heavy topic, if we're being honest. So how, how do we help people sort of find the next step? Cause I imagine, look, there's so many different ways we get into a depressive state. There's not one path. There's lots of them. And there's a lot of different scenarios that people are playing out in their heads, but how do we, how do we help somebody sort of, how do we pull them out of the mud and, and get them on the right track?

‍

carlo (03:56.296)

Yeah, of course. And I think there are a lot of different options. You know, the first option is obviously you don't want, I mean, of course you want to be the person who wants to help, who wants to go through the trenches with you, who wants to give you advice. But a lot of times, especially from my point of view, sometimes that's not what I wanted. I just wanted somebody just to be there with me, to listen to me if I felt like talking.

‍

If I didn't feel like talking, at least I knew somebody was there in the room with me, sitting on the couch with me, watching TV with me, doing something as long as I wasn't alone. I think that is a very crucial thing that a lot of people don't do, is that they want to solve the problem, and rightfully so, because they want to help a friend, a loved one, a colleague, whoever, but sometimes the best thing you can do is do nothing but be there and just be present. And another thing I would encourage is you don't want to give up on the person you want to help. You know, so for example, if I have a guy named John beside me and he's going through the mud like I was back in the day, I would not give up on that person because even though right now it may not be the best time, who knows, maybe a week, a month, he might be more acceptable to receiving help. Now, if I were in the shoes again, what I would do is knowing what I know now, I would change everything I'm doing. So what I was doing was laying in bed every single day for a year, not moving like an inch. I would barely leave my bed, let alone my bedroom. And I realized that the environment I was in, the lack of movement I was doing, what I was focusing on, everything was like this catastrophic puzzle. And each individual thing I was doing was a individual puzzle piece that was making a whole big picture of negativity.

‍

So what I would do, the first thing was change the way I move, because I know my body language has a direct correlation to what I think and how I feel. So I would definitely change my body language, change my environment, what I see, what I'm experiencing, because then I can be more susceptible or subjected to different things. Even if I'm outside for like five minutes, I'm still witnessing something completely different.

‍

and I can be more acceptable to inspiration, ideas, creativity, even though it sounds like really simple and really stupid maybe, that's probably what I would do.

‍

Tom Finn (06:30.771)

Yeah, so I love the way you started that you talked about just being present physically present with someone who is struggling, just being in the room, hanging out, just being in their space is a big step forward for someone. And I think I get that, right? I mean, it doesn't get better when you're alone. So just having somebody there probably provides some layer of comfort. And then the next thing you said was really around how to how to stay supportive over a period of time because I imagine if you're the supporter, it gets frustrating when somebody just doesn't turn a switch and move in the right direction because you showed up with your happy flowers that day and all of a sudden you expect them to just turn the corner because you're there. I get that and I imagine a lot of people have a hard time staying the course with friends and loved ones that are going through some level of depression.

‍

carlo (07:27.364)

Absolutely.

‍

Tom Finn (07:30.227)

So when you think about it for you, you're saying, look, if I could go back in time, I would have just moved my body. I would have gotten up. I would have gotten out in the world. I would have breathed some fresh air, gotten outside, seen the blue sky or the raindrops. I think it doesn't really matter what the weather is. Just get outside. And look, there's a lot of scientists that tell you that's a great place to start for all of us. No matter if you are mildly depressed, anxious, or in some serious capacity from a depression standpoint. So it all works the right way. So let's just say somebody's moving forward. How do you make sure that, gosh, you don't slip backwards? I feel like that's something I'd be thinking about is, okay, I've made some progress. How do I make sure I don't go back to that room, back to that bed and knock it up?

‍

carlo (08:23.522)

Yeah, so a big thing I like to talk about is exactly what I just mentioned about the individual puzzle pieces that create the negative picture, but in the exact opposite way. So what I like to call it, I like to call it a playbook or a toolbox. Every single thing that helped me overcome my own depression and suicidal ideation is an individual puzzle piece or individual play from a playbook or individual tool for my toolbox. So it's not just one thing that helped me. It was a combination of things that helped me. So one thing that I know I personally do and that helps me and my clients is we use these tools, these toolbox, we use these plays from a playbook, right? I'm not saying that you're never gonna feel depressed again or sad or anxious, fearful, whatever again. Of course we're gonna feel these things. It's only human, it's natural and it's normal, but it's how long do we stay there? And with these tools, these strategies, moving your body, your focus, your thought patterns, your language that you use, your environment that you're in, your physical fitness, nutrition, so many things come into play. So it's how can I pull a certain play out of my playbook to use in this given circumstance to, okay, help me from the certain situation I'm in so that way it doesn't keep me in the bed on the couch 24 -7 like it used to. Now I'm equipped and that's what I personally use.

‍

Tom Finn (09:51.155)

Nice. So when you think about, uh, if you sort of set depression aside and this kind of big, heavy topic aside for just a second, and you think about the general population and how are you helping regular folks, uh, you know, in the world today, um, that, that just need to be supported.

‍

carlo (10:13.248)

Honestly, I'm trying to do anything I can. I do my keynotes, content on social media. My whole philosophy is I want to speak to many. Of course, I have one-on-one conversations with my clients and whatnot, but how I'm helping people is through my content, through my keynotes. Eventually, if they do become a client, that's how I help. But honestly, it's just any person I come in contact with, I want to serve, I want to help, I want to offer up something value because something I've realized, especially in entrepreneurship. And I think just in life in general, it's not what you can get from somebody else, but it's what you can give. And then when you start giving from a heart centered place, that's where like the law of reciprocity comes into play and that's where you get served for yourself. So how I'm serving everyone, the average Joe, is I'll just have a conversation with someone. If I see someone's down, obviously, I want to help them. Even if they're not going through something like that where it's mental, something that I can actually see.Β 

‍

Like I remember there's this one story where I was heading up to New Jersey to visit my grandmother and grandfather for like Thanksgiving or something like that. And we were at a gas station and I can actually see this person, this guy, he's at a gas, he's legit pushing his car to the gas pump, but he can't do it. And I didn't see this at first, but he was like walking back and forth with like cups, actual like big gulps, cups of gasoline to put in his car, but it wasn't working and needed help to go to the pump. And I saw him. So I dropped everything. My family is like, where are you going? I was like, come with me. And my brothers came with me and we just helped the guy to the pump to fill up. Like it was something so simple, you know? So my whole philosophy is if I see somebody in distress, like why can't I help them? You know, like I'm here, I got two arms, two legs, like why not? So any way, shape or form that I can serve. I want to take advantage of that opportunity, whether it's just having a conversation with somebody, if I see they're actually down, like I can get a sense of their energy, or if I see they need a hand to get their car to the gas pump, or they may not have money to buy groceries and someone's car got declined in the grocery store, like something like that. If I see an opportunity to help, I want to help, I want to serve.

‍

Tom Finn (12:34.451)

Yeah, that's a wonderful place to be. And certainly a place that, that we all aspire to be as well. When, when you see folks that are facing common challenges, individuals, um, do they, do they get bucketed from your perspective into different types of challenges that people face? Help us kind of get a landscape, uh, kind of feel here.

‍

carlo (12:56.7)

Kind of like categorized, is that what you mean? Yeah.

‍

Tom Finn (12:58.643)

That's what I'm thinking about is how do I, how do I look at this in buckets or categories like you mentioned and think about the challenges people face? Cause look, we're all human. Like you said earlier, we have different needs and wants desires and we face some of the same challenges.

‍

carlo (13:13.692)

I would say a big thing that I've come to realize and I don't have a whole bunch, I don't have a lot of categories I can go off of, but one category I definitely know I know, because this is something I dealt with, is especially when I talk to anybody, entrepreneurs, CEOs, or just an average guy who works a job who maybe wants to do something. They know they're meant for more, but for some reason they can't get there and it's because of this belief they have about themselves. And as soon as I hear, yeah, but I don't know if I can do that, immediately my mind goes to, okay, there's something deep down inside you that says, I don't believe in myself, I'm not good enough, maybe I don't love myself enough to give myself permission to start a business, to leave my corporate job and do something else that I'm really passionate about and love, or leave my stupid nine to five, I know I meant for more, let me do a non profit, something like that, anything like that. Anybody who says they want something, but they can't get there because they feel like there's something about them, I automatically put it into the bucket of, okay, there's some self doubt, severe self doubt in here, lack of self love. We need to change the story. And that's the category that I definitely like, as soon as I hear that particular word or set of words, I know I can put them in this category.

‍

Tom Finn (14:37.555)

Okay, that makes sense. So we've got self -doubt limiting beliefs as a major pillar. What other pillars have you seen?

‍

carlo (14:50.588)

Honestly off the top of my head I can't really think of much because that's the biggest one I see especially the clients I particularly help. I would say there, if this can be a pillar, because I was here as well, and this is kind of in addition to limiting beliefs, I don't know if this is a separate pillar or maybe just something much larger, is this hopelessness feeling of despair, of no matter what I try, nothing is gonna get better, because I was there myself. And I feel like that might even be something separate because, back in the day when I was going through it, not only did I have those living beliefs, but they were so strong, it developed something in myself that says, no matter what I do, I'll always fail, it's hopeless. I'll always be depressed, I'll always be like this, nothing will ever get better. And I feel like that is literally like level 100 severity, right? Like that's when somebody needs help, is when they say, this is hopeless, I can't do it anymore.

‍

And I've had some clients like that and thankfully I've helped them and they're doing much better now. But I would probably say that's probably another category of like the most severe I've seen is that word hopeless. And I would say that's probably another bucket or pillar I could probably put people into.

‍

Tom Finn (16:21.747)

Yeah. So let's stay on the limiting beliefs piece because I think you, you highlighted that as the most important. And I think we all have limiting beliefs. I, you know, even if man, you could go to Deion Sanders, uh, head coach at Colorado and you could say he is the most confident person on the planet. And you'd, you'd probably be pretty close to being right. I guarantee you on any given day coach prime has limiting beliefs on certain topics about himself or where things are going. And now his, his outsourced support system is his faith. He's very open about that. Um, that's how he gets his limiting beliefs corrected and put back on track. Um, but what are some of the limiting beliefs that we see and in, in this pillar? Uh, and, uh, and then we'll get to how we can kind of overcome them.

‍

carlo (17:14.492)

Yeah, of course. So a lot of things I personally dealt with and I've seen is I am not good enough. I am not smart enough. I'm not capable enough. I don't have the time. I don't have the money. I don't have contacts, the network. So the most of the conversations I've had are people who want something, but they're not there because they don't think themselves are good enough, right? And that's probably the most common thing that I've seen. And it's all the same I see to myself. I'm not saying every person's situation is the exact same, but when I hear those words, I think it's the exact same thing every single time. And it's just doing this exercise, which I'm sure we're gonna cover in a moment, but doing this one thing to disprove this living belief, but not only that, they'll be giving yourself permission to move forward and to perform at your highest potential and achieve your goals. Yeah, it's just people literally think they're not good enough. And I've heard this from professional athletes. I've heard this from like any walk of life you can think of. And you think to yourself like, why? How do these people have living beliefs about themselves? But like you said, it's a normal thing that we all deal with. And I think that's the most common one is that people just think they're just not good enough for some weird reason.

‍

Tom Finn (18:48.147)

Yeah. So do you think that comes from, oh man, we're going to go down like the therapist line here. I was going to say, does it come from childhood Carlo? Is it our parents? Should we blame mom and dad for all of our trials and tribulations?

‍

carlo (18:52.188)

Hehehehe. Yes and no, like obviously a lot of things come from childhood, but not 100 % of the time is it from mom and dad for raising us incorrectly or for teaching us wrong, you know, depends on who you're talking to, like what situation. However, most things I've seen is just things that happen throughout life, not even through childhood, but when you're a young adult, when you are an adult, even if it was last week, there are things that occur in our lives that our brain picks up and puts it in the filing cabinet. So I like to compare our brains to a computer, right? And whenever it needs a file, it just goes to the filing cabinet, the digital filing cabinet and pulls it out. So anytime somebody has a limiting belief about themselves, they're saying to themselves, okay, I wanna start a business, I wanna lose weight, I wanna do something. Immediately when they start thinking, their brain is looking for evidence.

‍

Because the brain's main job is for you to survive, not to thrive. It doesn't want to make you happy. That's not the brain's job. The brain's job is to make you live and protect you from threats. Now obviously today we don't have the threats like we used to have thousands and thousands of years ago. You know, we don't have to fight for survival. We have air conditioned homes. You know, if we want food, we don't have to hunt anymore. We just order it from DoorDash, from our phones. It's that easy.Β 

‍

But our brains haven't evolved. So we're still looking for threats. How? It wants to protect us from fear. So we want to start a business. Oh, we haven't done it before, or maybe we haven't failed. So our brain is then pulling this file from its filing cabinet and say, oh, remember last year you failed at this? Oh, and then remember this one time you failed at this? Oh, then remember when you were 10 years old, let's wind the clock back 30 years and you failed at your science experiment? Remember that? So your brain is constantly pulling all these memories, all these examples, quote unquote, evidence from your filing cabinet and it's proven to you saying, hey, don't do this, don't do anything, play it safe so that way we can protect you. And that's why people start to develop these loaning beliefs about themselves because they're using this quote unquote evidence as substantial evidence saying, oh, you know, maybe I shouldn't do this because… I didn't succeed at it in the past and I didn't succeed at these other things in the past too. Maybe it's best I don't quit my job and start a business or try to lose weight or do something else, do a nonprofit, whatever the case may be. However, what I've come to realize, and I don't know if I'm allowed to give the, to say it now, how to overcome the living belief, is that cool or sweet? Is there another question? I kind of went on a tangent.

‍

Tom Finn (21:49.363)

No, you're on a roll, man. Just keep going. Look, I'll just mute the microphone. You ask your own questions. Take control of this thing.

‍

carlo (21:52.124)

I went on a tangent there. I was like, I was legit going, I was like, where am I going with this? Like, should I stop? Did I answer the question properly? Anyway, so your brain is literally looking for evidence, that's all it's doing. And that's why people have these beliefs. However, what I understood about a belief is that it is just a story that we attach enough emotion behind it. That's all a belief is, it's just a story. And you believe it so much so, not only because there's enough emotion, but because your brain now has evidence.Β 

‍

So once I understood this, I realized I can do the same thing, but the exact opposite way in order for me to disprove my limiting belief. So what I did was A, I needed to be self -aware. I needed to write down what my limiting belief or plural beliefs are. For me personally, I told myself that I was a failure, I was a loser. I'm not smart, I'm not capable, I'll never succeed at anything in my life. Those are like my big ones. And I wrote it down. And then after I wrote that down, I wrote down why each of those living beliefs were BS. I wrote it down, I was like, this is so stupid, so false because, and then like I went crazy, I was a madman. I just started writing and writing until I exhausted myself. And not only did that help me disprove my limiting belief, but, I needed evidence to like put the nail in the coffin. So what I did, it's almost like a meditative exercise. I do this for myself all the time. I do it with my clients and sometimes my keynotes, I'll do this exercise as well. Is I will close my eyes and I will go back to moments from my past that reflects moments where I was confident, moments where I was successful, moments where I achieved something, right? Felt attractive, felt smart, whatever the case may be, whatever the opposite of your limiting belief is, that's what I would have people do, is reflect on a moment and not just think about it, but really step into the moment as if you're reliving it right now. It's like if you're riding a roller coaster and you feel like you're about to go over the edge, that's what I mean by people reliving these moments. So that's what I did and I relived these moments where I felt super confident, super successful, attractive, whatever the case may be, smart. And I realized that not only did I feel better, I was giving myself permission to move forward with my goal, but I was literally disproving my limiting belief and I had evidence to back my claim. And anytime, I want to be honest with you dude, like today, today was kind of like a weird start for me. I was like, man, I maybe… Maybe I'm not doing so well as I thought I was. Maybe this is just not cutting out for me. Maybe I should just try something different in my business strategy. But then I was like, wait a minute, let's take a step back. Just do this exercise. And I did, I was like, oh wow, okay. Things are pretty cool. Things are looking pretty good right now. I'm doing pretty well. I did a keynote slash training for Verizon. I'm going down to Florida to do this. I'm doing this. I'm doing podcasts. Things are doing great. And I literally just proved my limiting belief by telling myself and writing it down why it's BS and then pulling moments from my past that prove my claim and stepping into those moments and proving that I am successful, attractive, smart, whatever the case may be.

‍

Tom Finn (25:36.019)

Look, I love this philosophy. I love the way you're doing it because you're giving everybody a tool in the toolbox like you mentioned earlier and being able to take things that are in your past, moments that are in your past and remind yourself that you can do it because you have done it is a great way to pick yourself up and a great way to put a positive file in your electronic file cabinet in your brain. And when your brain goes searching, you're looking for those positive files, not the negative files in your brain. Um, so I, I love that philosophy. How do you, how do you help people or what's your angle on things that you've never done before? So let's, let's come up with some sort of scenario, something I've never done. Okay. Let's go something simple. Like you and I are in Hawaii and we've never surfed before and somebody wants us to go surfing. We're with a group of guys. And somebody says, let's all go surfing and you and I are just going, Oh man, I can't surf. I've never stood up on a surfboard. I don't, I don't want to Carlo to laugh at me when I fall off the surfboard and bang myself on the coral. How do we do something like that? We've never done before.

‍

carlo (26:45.544)

Yeah, I love that. That's really fun. I've never been asked that question. That's cool. So I would do a couple things. One, especially if you are about to do something you've never done before, obviously fears coming into play. What I understood is that every single emotion is physical. So if you think about moments where you felt really happy, excited, what did your body language look like? How was that physically manifested? And then the opposite, when you feel fearful, anxious, sad, what does your bilingual look like? It's probably more closed, more reserved. You probably feel a lot of tension. Maybe some people even go to the extent of having anxiety and feeling this real tightness in their chest and their throat. I know when I was very depressed even, not only was I laying down all the time, but my shoulders were rounded forward, my head was tilted down, and no matter what emotion I was feeling, it had a direct physical attribute.

‍

So if I were fearful and I was about to go surfing, I was anxious, I was like, oh man, I'm gonna fall, people are gonna laugh at me, I'm gonna be embarrassed. First thing I would do is change my physiology. Just change the way I move my body. Because I understand the different body language I use, the physiology I use will create a different result, meaning if I'm scared and I get on the surfboard scared, what are the odds I'm gonna suck to pretty high? But if I get on the surfboard and I'm feeling confident and I feel happy and I feel like I can make a good decision, the odds are probably a lot higher if I were to succeed being on a surfboard, even though I've never done it before. Not that you're going to be professional and you're going to win the next Surfing World Cup or whatever the case may be, but you're definitely going to perform in a lot, in a better way. The next thing I would do is a lot of people when they are fearful, or where they're kind of anxious about doing something that they've never done before and they're questioning, oh my gosh, am I going to do it right? Is something going to happen? Am I going to fail? Everything that they're thinking of, they're focusing on a negative outcome. They're focusing on, oh, I'm going to fail, I'm going to fall. Then they're going to laugh at me. And then I'm going to be the laughing stock at the vacation. And then I'm not going to be able to join my vacation. You see how it's like stacking and stacking and all that person is doing is simply focusing on the failures.

‍

What I understood and what helped me and helps my clients is I understood that whatever I focus on, I will get in return. Easy as that. And a simple exercise that I really like help people kind of let that set in is if people were to look around their office right now, if you're driving, please don't do this. But if you are just like in your office right now, sitting down, you're in your kitchen or whatever, and you look around your kitchen and just look for the color brown. Just look for the color brown, like a maniac. Just keep looking for brown. You keep finding it, keep finding it. Then all of a sudden you close your eyes and try your best to remember what was white. Probably can't do it because you were so hyper -focused on what was brown. Now is that to say that white didn't exist? Absolutely not, it's still there. But you're so focused on brown, you could care less. You could even think in what was white. So if we put real context into that, okay, let's say the brown is all your negative thoughts. You're focusing on the failures, you're focused on falling, you're focused on wiping out on the wave, you're focusing on the laughing stock you think you're gonna be for the whole vacation. That's what you're gonna get in return. But if you actually set your sights and focus on the outcome you actually want and step into that moment as if it's already happened, just like how we did of overcome those living beliefs, stepping into a moment of visualizing yourself, completing the surf, that's even a proper term, or riding the wave, that's a better one. I can be cool, but completing the surf, what the hell is that?

‍

Tom Finn (30:52.339)

Yeah, I think it's I think it's riding the wave, but completing the story. That tells everybody you're from Virginia. You're not from California or Hawaii.

‍

carlo (31:00.579)

Oh yeah, so they can give me some slack. Completing the surf. Oh, people are going to give me shit for that.

‍

Tom Finn (31:07.859)

Yeah, well, I mean, I'm looking forward to completing the surf myself. But but look, in all seriousness, I like I like what you're saying here. What you're saying is focus on the positives and the positives will follow focus on the negatives, and the negatives will follow. It's your choice, you get to decide what you want to focus on. And what I liked in your earlier comments, what I liked was they're puzzle pieces. It's not one picture and it's either make it or break it. They're parts. They're some of those parts creates the entire picture. So you can remove the negative ones and you can add the positive ones and create the picture you want. Isn't that the way to think about it?

‍

carlo (31:46.85)

Yeah, 100%.

‍

Tom Finn (31:55.539)

Well, I mean, I guess we're done here then. I figured it out. Look, I love the way that you're addressing limiting beliefs and and helping people figure out how to get those out of their brain. What do you say to the naysayers? You say, Carlo, that's great and all for you, bud, because you figured this out. But you know what? I just can't get out of this job that I hate. I just can't get out of this marriage that's driving me nuts. I just can't, you know, move out of the country and go live in Spain like I want to. What do you say to those people that really do feel stuck? How do you take the first step?

‍

carlo (31:58.241)

No, but… What I would say is - This is a cliche answer, but if I can do it, so can you. And obviously I'm going to expand on that, but the biggest thing holding someone back is literally a decision. Because if they want to move out of the country and go to Spain and live there or quit their job that they're paid and they're miserable, the only thing keeping them there is them, is their actions or their thought patterns, behaviors everything that they're doing is keeping them there. And this is something I learned that is, it sounds harsh, but once I really sat down with it, I came to terms with it. I was like, okay, this makes a lot of sense. And I vibe with it. Is where you are at currently in life is because of your current decisions. Plain and simple. So if you are on the side of the street begging for money, there's a reason why you're there. If you are living in a penthouse, because you worked your way up, there's a reason why you're there. It's because of the decisions you made, the actions you took, and behaviors, and the thoughts, right? So any person that says that they feel stuck, they say, yeah, it's easy for you to say, it was not easy for me to say. I was legit hopeless and this close to legit making the one decision you can't come back from. And I feel like if I can go from that point and… Literally just make one decision that I did not even know the outcome to Just take a leap of faith and just do something different Just make one choice It literally saved my life and what if I encounter anyone that said oh, yeah easy for you to say But I can't do it because I'm just stuck and I can't do it. I would say just do one thing differently Just take a leap of faith do something and you see where you end up and that's probably my response to that.

‍

Tom Finn (34:41.363)

Yeah, I love it. And you've said that the entire show today, do something differently, focus on your physical movement, get outside, sit next to a friend. You don't have to talk, sit next to a friend, a family member, somebody that just can be in your space. Those are all wonderful lessons and things that we should be doing to help others that are struggling with, you know, anxiety or depression or fear and having those limited beliefs. So Carlo appreciate you dropping all this knowledge on everybody today my friend. Thanks for being on the show.

‍

carlo (35:15.325)

Of course, thank you. And don't forget, you gotta complete the search.

‍

Tom Finn (35:18.579)

That's right. We're going to complete the surf right here and find out where people can find you on the internet. Where can people track you down when they want to check in with you and perhaps work with you in the future?

‍

carlo (35:30.909)

Yeah, of course, if anyone wants to dive deeper and wants to overcome those glimpy beliefs and hopelessness, I would love to help transform your mindset, perform at the best level you can, whether it be in personal life or in business. Go ahead and visit me on my Instagram. That's carlo taormina underscore life coach. All you have to do is just send me a DM and I would love to help you. I would even love to book you a free strategy call just to see how I can help. And we'll go from there.

‍

Tom Finn (35:55.763)

Yeah, beautiful. Check them on the gram. We'll put all that in the show notes and you can check in with Carlo right from your telephone computer. It's fantastic. I love innovation. All right, Carlo. Thanks my friend. Thanks for being on the show. We'll see you next time.

‍

carlo (36:09.629)

Thank you, Tom. See ya.

Tom Finn
Podcaster & Co-Founder

Tom Finn (he/him) is an InsurTech strategist, host of the Talent Empowerment podcast, and co-founder and CEO of an inclusive people development platform.

Share this post

Latest episodes

The Ebbs and Flows of Being an Entrepreneur & Building LeggUP
What that experience taught us is to diversify our revenue streams
Quit Losing Talent
Build a culture that no one can deny that it's great
Recruitment for Blue-Collar Businesses
AI is a big change in recruitment today